Never tell anyone your plans, goals or dreams UNLESS they can help you
(excerpt from my new eBook “Mind Your Own Damn business: Hard Lessons Learned the WRONG Way!” available on Amazon July 1, 2015)
As black people, we have such a dire need for approval. Mostly because it drives not just us but our desires or more important need for acceptance and approval. We must realize that people will never see for you what they can never see for themselves. If a young awkward looking, tall thin black girl from the ghetto tells her family or friends that she wants to be a model, they may laugh at her and tell her it’s not going to happen and she may accept that they are right and forget about her dream even though she grows up to be outrageously beautiful and her dream could have very well been a reality but now she’s a cashier at Wal-Mart with 2 kids. A crab in the barrel victim. The people she depended on and trusted didn’t believe in THEMSELVES which caused her not to believe in herself. This is why black entrepreneurs should never tell someone else they can’t do something because we learn through doing business that anything is possible and our confidence to have our own businesses skyrocket to a level we never thought possible. We are keenly aware of our uniqueness.
If the potential model pursued that goal without telling her family, they would have been the same people who would have said “Yes chile, I always saw something special in her, I knew she would be a star (can I borrow $20,00?).” My cousin used to tell me “Everybody Loves a Winner” and we want to be associated with them, even if we have nothing to do with their success. That’s our need for approval on the reverse. If we ASSOCIATE ourselves with successful people maybe some of it will rub off on us. It will and it’s NO different when we associate ourselves with NEGATIVE people.